It’ll Be Off

The Weekly Web Weview
June 30, 2008, 3:28 pm
Filed under: News | Tags: , ,

Did BobBlackburn Park Avenue boss Dave Cameron let slip a little glimpse of how BPA are run in the Bradford Telegraph and Argus this week? Talking about the players who have left their club, Cameron said of Griff Jones “He [Blackburn] wanted to keep him and even give him a raise because he had done well on loan at Radcliffe. I hadn’t seen him play enough and told him I didn’t want him. I had to be firm but I prevailed on that one. Bob said it was my final decision.”

Interesting stuff. The chief exec dictating the buying policy? Dabbling in the manager’s affairs? Handing out wage rises willy-nilly? Recipe for disaster.

Griff Jones, by the way, was linked with FC United by Bob Blackburn a few weeks ago. No news on that, but according to the forum, fellow former BPA striker Paul Gedman could be another potential signing. Gedman lives in Manchester and scored against us twice last season.

Meanwhile, Rory Patterson has got off to a flyer on BPA’s preseason tour. Though some of the opposition (Russian/Bulgaria XI?) is questionable. Is it a little soon to be starting preseason? I dunno.

Finally, to round off a heavily BPA influenced WWW (don’t blame me, like I said the other day, it’s summer, it’s quiet time), the office have announced that we’re to play a friendly against Salford City at Moor Lane, on Wednesday 30 July, 19.45 kick off. It’ll be five quid in, two quid concessions.


June 30, 2008, 11:24 am
Filed under: Opinion | Tags: , ,

(With full, maximum possible apologies for the post title. Time is against me and my creative juices aren’t flowing. It was either that or “Spain’s Euro 2008 victory resonates as far as FC United of the Northern Premier League Premier Division in an argument over shirt-sponsorship” but I’m not sure that would have fit in the little text box WordPress gives me to edit these things)

Germany may win a lot of finals, but they sure as hell lose a lot too. John Motson quoted the figure at one stage, I think he said six wins in thirteen finals, but it’s hard to be 100% certain as I was busy tucking in to a bowl of lemon sorbet. And besides, I generally try and pay as little attention as I can to the BBC’s Mostson/Lawrenson axis of evil.

But how good was Marcos Senna, not just last night but throughout the tournament? I don’t wish to open a debate about the residency rules that allowed Senna, one of four Brazilian born players, to appear at Euro 2008. I don’t give a shit about all that nonsense. I was raised on a hippy commune believing that we are all citizens of planet Earth, and we shouldn’t be defined by socio-political boundaries. I’ve left much of that behind me, cutting my hair, changing my name from Moonbeam Sunshine to Chris Taylor, and taking a hard line on patchouli oil and granola. Besides, much of the sputtering about this stems from the fact that we, England, don’t have our own pet Brazilian. There certainly seems to be a clear relationship between number of Brazilians in a team, and number of trophies won. Just look at Brazil.

What was I talking about? Ah, yes, Marcos Senna.

Despite only being 5’8, Senna appears to have a great presence on the field. He’s Makelele-like in that respect. He covers space brilliantly, and competes for every ball. Allied to this, he can play a bit too. He has quick feet, and great technique, and was unlucky not to score last night – for once his stature counted against him as he just failed to get a touch on a left-wing cross.

While the flair players, and elegant midfielders such as Fabregas and Iniesta will gain most of the fanfares, Senna was essential to the Spanish victory, and I can say (safe in the knowledge there’s no way I can be proved wrong) that they would not have won their first tournament in 44 years without him. Every team needs a player like Marcos Senna.

Which, as I was reminded by an article in The Observer, is a viewpoint shared by Alex Ferguson. Everyone’s favourite Champagne Socialist tried to sign Senna two years ago, identifying him as the man to replace Roy Keane. A fee was agreed with Senna’s club Villareal, and personal terms were also agreed. The official website even went so far as to announce his arrival. But the deal mysteriously collapsed at the last minute. And why? Well, according to Senna, AIG wanted an Englishman instead, so the club turned their attention to Owen Hargreaves instead.

Owen Hargreaves isn’t a bad choice, not by any means. In fact, given their respective ages, it could easily be argued that Hargreaves is the better choice (and if you can’t have a Brazilian in your team to guarantee success, having a German is the next best alternative. Unless it’s Michael Ballack, of course). But I can’t get over the mind-warping idiocy of letting a sponsor dictate your transfer policy. Maybe it was a member of our own 127 Club that decided Rudd would be released? Or did Williams BMW banjax our bid to sign a much needed holding midfield player and tell us to get another winger instead?

There’s been debate a lot of debate on the forum recently about shirt sponsorship, both of the first team and the fans’ team. It led to me checking the constitution, and the latest amendment voted in at the AGM: “That the clothing (ie playing kit) of the players representing the Club shall not include any advertising thereon, except as follows, which shall not be considered to be advertising:…”. I can’t be arsed to type out the whole thing, but it’s here, on page 9, should you want to read it. The amendment was passed with 343 for and 35 against. It is clearly something that the members feel is core to what our club should and does stand for.

It can be easy to get bogged down in thinking about sponsorship, and advertising, and alice bands, and white/orange/red boots and all the other extraneous bullshit that pollutes our game. With Euro 2008 now out of the way, and the friendlies just around the corner, it’s time to forget all that crap, and concentrate on the important stuff: having a beer, having a sing song, and supporting the shirts.

It’s oh so quiet
June 28, 2008, 1:56 pm
Filed under: Opinion | Tags: , , ,

Summer, eh? What a crock of shit. I’m desperate for some scandal and intrigue in order to fill the pages of this blog, and keep amused the dozen or so hardy readers who keep revisiting, looking in earnest for the latest news on Leigh Genesis (that name gets no less stupid after time, does it?), Bradford Park Avenue and George Orwell. Instead all I get is endless paper talk about that pouting onanist Cristiano Ronaldo. I have no interest in that story any more. Let him go, for Christ’s sake. I was never overly fond of him in the first place. Great player, weasel of a man. But whatever. I’ll leave all discussion about that preening tit to the Glazers, Calderon and Ferguson. Now there’s an unholy triumvirate if ever there was one. Like Alien vs Predator, whoever wins, we lose.

Thank God, then, for the distraction that Euro 2008 has offered. Germany, no doubt buoyed by the bigging up I gave them on this very blog, have reached the final and are now the only realistic choice for any Red to support. Why, you may ask? Well other than the brilliantly thought out reasons I highlighted at the start of the tournament, all you need do is look at the way Spain have been adopted by the Scouse Nation. The boundaries between Liverpool and Spain have become blurred in my gin-addled mind. To all intents and purposes, the two teams are the same to me now.

Every Liverpool fan I’ve had the misfortune of meeting over the past three weeks has gone Iberia crazy. The wily charms of Torres, (the soon to depart) Xabi Alonso and Benitez have whipped the normally anti-jingoistic Sousers in to a pro Spanish fervour. Witness, if you will, Nike’s latest offering:

Good lord, that’s infuriating. Have you ever had the pleasure of talking to a Liverpudlian trying to pronounce ‘Espania’? My God. I ended up looking like Bill Murray after his first encounter with Slimer in Ghostbusters so covered in phlegm and saliva was I. But that’s by the by. I don’t expect everyone to share in my bitterness, and this post, I suppose, is just the Yang to the AFC Liverpool post‘s Ying. The natural order is being restored.

Closer to home, the NPL have announced a new kit deal with Adidas. I don’t fully understand the ramifications of it all, and nor shall I bother looking in to them, as I’m almost certain it’ll not effect us in the slightest way. And while the thought of FC United running out in a kit with those famous three strips down the sleeves awakens a nostalgic stirring in not just my loins but most of the lower part of my body, I’m satisfied that it’ll never happen, and that like most of the Eastern Europeans I’ve been watching at Ladies’ Wimbledon last week, the reality would never be as good as the fantasy.

Not quite finally, I’ve been getting a fair few visitors from the Boston United forum and website They seem a likable bunch, and their ‘zine is both funny and (occasionally) informative. And they seem to hate BPA as much as I do. So there’s common ground at least – the enemy of my enemy is my friend, and all that. Boston is the away I’m most looking forward to next year. It should be fantastic. York Street is a proper ground, and they’ve got mostly the players that were playing two levels higher last year, before their enforced relegation. They should be favourites for promotion, and they’ve got a decent fan-base, which’ll give us Reds a bit of competition. Should be top.

Properly finally, there seems to have been a good response to the Brodsworth Welfare trip bit from a few days ago. If anyone has owt similar that they want to email to me, I’d be delighted to stick it up. Saves me wasting my time trying desperately to think of something to add to the site. Ping it over to me at and you’ll be loved forever not just be me, but by all those people who stumble across this blog whilst looking for something else.

Fixture list leaked?
June 26, 2008, 10:40 am
Filed under: News | Tags: ,

This, if the the ever reliable forum is to be believed (hahaha, alarm bells ringing for anyone?), is a leaked version of our fixture list for 2008/09. According to the deep throat who announced them, this is not a completed list, and is subject to some change. Which probably means it’ll bear no resemblance whatsoever to the final list. But hey, I thought I’d share it with you anyway, and if it’s right, which we should find out in early July according to the Unibond League Website, I can bask in the reflected glory.

Fc United Fixtures list 2008/09

Saturday 16-Aug Ashton United H Unibond League Premier Division
Wednesday 20-Aug Boston United A Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 23-Aug North Ferriby United A Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 25-Aug Unibond League Challenge Cup
Saturday 30-Aug Cammell Laird A Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 06-Sep North Ferriby United H Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 13-Sep Vauxhall Motors H Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 20-Sep Bradford Park Avenue H Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 27-Sep Eastwood Town A Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 29-Sep Unibond League Challenge Cup
Saturday 04-Oct FA Trophy FA Trophy
Monday 06-Oct PC Unibond League Presidents Cup
Saturday 11-Oct Frickley Athletic H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 13-Oct Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 18-Oct Ilkeston Town A Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 20-Oct Leigh RMI H Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 25-Oct Vauxhall Motors A Unibond League Premier Division
Wednesday 29-Oct Prescott Cables A Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 01-Nov FA Cup/FA Trophy FA Cup/FA Trophy
Wednesday 05-Nov Ashton United A Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 08-Nov FA Cup/FA Trophy FA Cup/FA Trophy
Monday 10-Nov Boston United H Unibond League Challenge Cup
Saturday 15-Nov Whitby Town H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 16-Nov FA Cup/FA Trophy
Saturday 21-Nov FA Cup/FA Trophy FA Cup/FA Trophy
Monday 24-Nov Witton Albion H Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 28-Nov Buxton H Unibond League Premier Division
Wednesday 03-Dec Whitby Town A Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 06-Dec FA Cup/FA Trophy FA Cup/FA Trophy
Monday 08-Dec Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 13-Dec Ossett Town H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 15-Dec Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 20-Dec Ilkeston Town H Unibond League Premier Division
Friday 26-Dec Bradford Park Avenue A Unibond League Premier Division
Thursday 01-Jan Hucknall Town A Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 03-Jan Marine H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 05-Jan Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 10-Jan Kendal Town H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 12-Jan Unibond League Challenge Cup
Saturday 17-Jan FA Cup/FA Trophy FA Cup/FA Trophy
Monday 19-Jan PC Unibond League Presidents Cup
Saturday 24-Jan Cammell Laird H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 26-Jan Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 31-Jan FA Cup/FA Trophy FA Cup/FA Trophy
Wednesday 04-Feb Buxton A Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 06-Feb Guiseley H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 09-Feb Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 14-Feb Kendal Town A Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 16-Feb Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 21-Feb Frickley Athletic A Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 23-Feb Hucknall Town H Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 28-Feb Worksop Town H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 02-Mar Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 07-Mar Marine A Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 08-Mar Prescott Cables H Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 14-Mar Worksop Town A Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 16-Mar Unibond League Challenge Cup (Semi Final)
Saturday 21-Mar Eastwood Town H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 23-Mar PC Unibond League Presidents Cup
Saturday 28-Mar Matlock Town A Unibond League Premier Division
Wednesday 01-Apr Leigh RMI A Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 04-Apr Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 06-Apr Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 11-Apr Guiseley A Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 13-Apr PC Unibond League Presidents Cup
Saturday 18-Apr Witton Albion A Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 20-Apr Unibond League Challenge Cup (Final)
Saturday 25-Apr Matlock Town H Unibond League Premier Division
Monday 22-Apr Unibond League Premier Division
Saturday 02-May Ossett Town A Unibond League Premier Division

Two games against North Ferriby in the opening five fixtures? ‘Subject to change’ sounds about right.

FC Away Day Tales
June 25, 2008, 12:58 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: ,

Taken from the forum, a post by Salford10 that deserves a much wider audience. One that is literate, for a start.


I used to work with these two brothers from Collyhurst and Ancoats. They’d been in Manchester for 20 years but they was originally from Glasgow. Whenever they spoke to each other they spoke with Scottish accents but whenever they spoke to anyone else they spoke Collyhurst / Ancoats. Even in the same conversation it’d be Scottish to each other, then a line in Collyhurst / Ancoats to me, then back to Scottish. Fair play to em, they never missed a beat. They never spoke to anyone else in Scottish and I never heard em talking to each other in Collyhurst / Ancoats.
The younger of the two, Scottish Sammy, had a bust of Elvis in his flat. Struck me as odd because he was only 32. (Sammy, not Elvis. Elvis dosnt live in Collyhurst / Ancoats…he lives in Blackley).
Talking to two mates after the draw for the F.A. vase, one of whom watches FCUM and one of whom isn’t having it, I was reminded of the Glasgow / Collyhurst / Ancoats triangle. Two of us spoke ‘non-league’ whilst talking to the other in ‘normal United’. My footballing language has changed post-FCUM and the first venture into the vase was already adding to the lexicon.
I never found out why the brothers spoke to each other in Scottish and everyone else in Collyhurst / Ancoats. I guessed it was probably because on the estate Scottish Sammy was known as ‘Mad Sammy’ and because he was the kind of fella who kept a bust of Elvis in his flat.

Theres something about the name Brodsworth that sounds a bit 1970’s. A bit 1970’s and a bit made up. It sounds like the name of a town in a kids TV show…the place where the ‘Brods’ live. It was a real ‘wherethefuckisthat?’ trip, though Im finding theres less of them as we scribble ourselves a new football map. I could tell it was gonna be in Yorkshire though…without the need of any map.
I was happy with the draw as it gave me a new name to add to my ‘Teams FCUM has played with a daft name’ list. They’re now tucked in between Clitheroe and the Laburnum Rovers of Atherton. (No real challenge to Daisy Hill yet though). To be fair that list should be 100% full of every team FCUM has played. They’re all daft names for a United supporter to be watching his team play against.
Turns out Brodsworth is situated between Doncaster and nowhere which is a massive disservice to nowhere.

Come the day of the game and though I wasn’t buzzin with ‘vase-fever’ I was looking forward to an away a bit farther afield. Transport arrived with me compadre and mentor Kieron, an exiled Salford red of enough years standing to have worn shorts to his first job interview.
Brodsworth had issued different coloured tickets for different parts of the ground. There was a few travellers meeting up for this one so we wanted to sort tickets together in the same end. It was down to me to sort tickets and Id made arrangements to pick em up from a few people including George the clubs kit-man.
The tickets was a bit of a mither because having to do anything is a bit of a mither but helpful people were helpful and they got sorted.
Took a call from George as we set-off. He was in a boozer called The Highwayman but he had to get off at one. No danger, we’d be there by then.

Reached Brodsworth with no mither. (Well…we took a (ahem) ‘detour’ into Doncaster, though with manly, stiff-upper-lippedness , we decided we meant to and it was necessary to find a bank. There cant be that many of em in Yorkshire).
We hadn’t found the Highwayman but we could find the ground and go from there. I stopped in a local shop for refreshments and directions. 20 minutes later, with me chat with Sam Dingle, Nora Batty and Jimmy Saville producing 3 different sets of directions, I Ieft em arguing and got back on the phone. The reason we hadn’t found the ground or the pub was because neither of em was in Brodsworth. The game was being played in some other backwater down the road.
Took another call from George asking me whereabouts. I was worrying that if I didn’t meet him soon the lads would be playing in skins.
The pub and the ground was in a place that didn’t sound ‘Yorkshire’, it sounded quite posh. Cant remember its name but it dosnt matter coz if you went back it would be gone. The sign said it was 11 miles to get there but they must’ve been dog-miles coz it took ages. I had more mither on the phone but I just blamed Yorkshire.

There was joy and despair when we reached the Highwayman. Joy at the sight of red hordes filling the car-park, songs being sung and flags draped from every surface. Despair at the fact that it was 30 yards away from the turning to Brodsworth we’d taken an hour earlier.
It wasn’t the best boozer in the world (It was shit), big, soulless family fun-pub but reds were doing their best to improve it. It looked like it had two Salford lasses on the door but the turned-out to be cardboard cut-outs of Vicky Pollard.
Got some tickets sorted and met up with the UTB lads and the Moston contingent who were all wearing hats like mine. It was lovely to see such homage being paid to me sartorial settings. A cynic may suggest they were taking the piss but I don’t trust or believe cynics.
I’d got there too late to get me tickets from the kit-man and Id missed his calls again.
There were disturbing reports of red-on-red skirmishes round the back of the Highwayman. So much for ‘The Soul Is One’. I didn’t see any of it meself but I was told that it was carnage in the kiddies ball-pool.

Finally got me ticket of the kit-wallah at the ground. I apologised for me tardiness and he said it was no drama but he wasn’t very smiley. Made-up to him by singing ‘Batman’ songs later though.
The mither over the colour of the tickets was pointless. Having mither in your life is a ball-ache at the best of times but mither over nowt is a killer. The potential relaxin time you lose out on coz you’re being mithered is gone. You cant get it back. That’s relaxin time Ive lost from me life, mithering over coloured tickets and then when I got to the turnstile, no bleeder asked me for any ticket of any colour. Walked straight in. Ive still got em…2 reds, 2 greens and one of them special mauve ones.
Hung the colours on the wall at the top of the grassy knoll. There was that many coppers on it it looked like the grassy knoll in Dallas. The dibble were sound all day to be honest…even if they did have to be told to move coz they were obscuring the lag.
We stood at the end that was a 3-foot wall with a big field behind it. A big field with an ice-cream van parked in it. Never in all my years of watching football have I been on a end / terrace / stand that’s had an ice-cream van in it. They don’t even do it in Itlay…mind, theyd probably throw it off the curva. (Ok…I know t was only an ice-cream van but sometimes the little-ist things are the biggest differences. And it was the towns major landmark. That and the superbly named off-licence ‘Rhythm and Booze).
I had a 99 and a Fab lolly.

From the opening minutes of the game it became clear that this was a game FCUM were gonna win. From my vantage point FCUM s 8’ 3 “ centre-half Liam Coyne was dominating Brodsworth’s number 9 with ease, though I think even Id have kept him in me back pocket. I don’t know the fellas name but I’ll remember him as the worst player Ive seen come up against FCUM. Its not that he was bad, though he was, he just looked completely out of his depth. The pace of Sheringham, the dribbling skills of Neil Webb, the work-rate of Seba Veron and the turning circle of an old dear with a shopping trolley. He made big Liam look like Paul McGrath.
There was loads of police and stewards about but everything was jovial and good-natured. Some Yorkshire types shouted a few bars of “Yarkshire, Yarkshire” to let us know where we were so we responded with “On the grass, on the grass” to let em know exactly where we were. And where we were stood.
About half-an-hour in, a fella stood near us holding a guitar. A guitar. At the match. Now me usual response to such a sight would be to observe that hes obviously a bell of the highest end, move away and leave him to his goon-ness. But y’know, as much as FCUM is about rediscovering old pleasures and experiences, its about discovering new ones. And I was stood there licking a 99 with raspberry sauce I wasn’t able to criticise from a position of strength. Him and a few others belted out Woody Guthrie in a FCUM style and you know what…it was fuckin smart. (Its still bellendishness to take a guitar to the match though. Im a fickle bleeder).

At half-time our party repaired to the big field behind the open end, henceforth known as Brodsworth green. A small contingent of brothers from Tameside arrived bearing buttys from the clubhouse and a very welcome tartan picnic blanket. It all got nice and mellow and a bit Camberwick on the green and for a short while it felt like we could be many places but it didn’t feel like a football match. A combination of the sun and relaxants of choice gave it the air of a summer festival (Albeit one in Yorkshire with no music. Bit like V festival).
A police van was parked-up nearby, providing neat shade for the large North Manchester types who get a sweat on by blinking. Some scamps had coverered the back of this van with stickers. You could call this vandalism or you could call it profile-raising. The dibble would probably call em a bugger to remove. Maybe they were just unlucky to have parked there or maybe it was karma. They did obscure the colours earlier on.
As the teams came out for the 2nd half, most were snapped back into the reality that we were at the match. The break had been lovely but I was ready for more of the same from the reds and anyway, the old boy from the St. Johns ambulance had realised where his blanket had gone and wanted it back. Wouldn’t wanna get grass-stains on me Levis.

The team put in a dominant performance against a Brodsworth side that never looked like they believed they could win. Their subs asking us at Half-time where we were going boozing after the game wasn’t a good sign for them. Brodsworth barely seemed to get passed FCUMs midfield and when they did it was just a hopeful / hopeless ball to Johnny Useless up front.
The famous ‘magic of the vase’, a 3-1 victory, a good game with a good atmosphere and all-in-all a top day. There’d surely be more of this on the inevitable march to the new Wembley.

A post-match venue to watch United had been organised by the man-who-organises-things; The Adam and Eve, a big square brick house a bit like the Lightbowne in Moston that looked about as welcoming as the Lightbowne in Moston. It was sweet though and we settled in to watch United on the big screen and scran the free chip muffins.
We were all in one big function room and when I went for a gypsies I noticed that next-door it was full of the Adam and Eve regulars. Not once did I notice any of them come into our room or anyone go into theirs. No mither at all. I wondered if they knew we were there and if the scenario would’ve been the same if we’d have been in a bigger city and the letters of our clubs name were arranged more traditionally. I put it all down to the man-who-organises-things and his love-beads.
Our table was joined after a while by members of the team. This would normally be me cue to get off but I took the opportunity to introduce meself to Will Ahern, a young player me and a few others sponsored for the season. It was a 12 pints introduction though and he seemed a bit wary of me. I tried to force him to eat a chip muffin coz theres nowt on him the nesh get and I told his mate to stop smoking near ‘me athlete’. He told me he needed the bog and no-ones seen him since.
I had a brief chat with the foreign lad Rudd as well but it was hard goin. He seems a nice enough lad but I couldn’t understand a word.
By this time the man-who-organises-things wanted me to wear love-beads and give out chips to the needy so I was in needy of getting off.
In the words of O’Shea Jackson…Today was a good day

N.B; Wembleys shite anyway, vases are for flowers and the North West Counties League Challenge cup is the big one.

(as a post script, the spell checker on my browser just told me there were too many supicious words in this document to check. Brilliant)

Margy gets giddy
June 24, 2008, 12:30 pm
Filed under: Transfer tittle-tattle | Tags:

Margy seemed barely able to contain himself as he announced his latest signing, former Crewe Alexandra and England *cough*under19*cough* striker Kyle Wilson.

FC United are pleased to announce the signing of 22 year old forward Kyle Wilson. Kyle’s former clubs include Altrincham and Droylsden.

Manager Karl Marginson said of the new signing “for his age Kyle’s already had some great footballing experiences including playing in the Football League for Crewe as well as international experience playing in England’s under 19s squad.”

Margy added “I tried to sign Kyle at the back end of last season but it didn’t work out. I am delighted he’s on board for the 08/09 campaign. I couldn’t be more excited about the way things are developing”

“Kyle and Carlos Roca who we signed earlier this week will be great additions to the squad and will undoubtedly entertain supporters when they pull on the shirt. They are both quick, young, exciting footballers and fit into the type of team we are building and how FC United should play football. And there will be more to come”

Which is good news. And if it’s enough to get Margy’s knickers in a twist, it’ll do for me.

Those with a memory not addled by Super Bock may remember him coming on as a sub for Skelmersdale in the Play-off final last season. He’s also played for Fleetwood Town, though not against us in the FA Cup. And if the last striker we signed from Skelmersdale is anything to go by, Wilson should do alright.

There’s not much about him on the net, apart from one very interesting story about how someone signed him for Linfield on Football Manager, so if you know owt about him, share it with us and the world.

Weekly Web, errr, Weview
June 23, 2008, 7:33 pm
Filed under: News | Tags: , , , , ,

Trawling through the web for the best stories, because not everyone has as much spare time as I do.

Bradford Park Avenue’s latest signing, freshly recovered from a car accident in which he ruptured his spleen, is former Manchester city reserve Jamie Tandy. Tandy is most famous for being the player who had a cigar stubbed out in his eye by Joey Barton, though what wasn’t widely reported was that this was in retaliation to an attempt by Tandy to set fire to Barton’s fancy dress costume. This alone should be enough to ensure some sort of award or recognition for Tandy. From all of football’s governing bodies and several government departments.

It’s also worth reminding everyone that Joey Barton is currently serving a six month prison term for two attacks described by the judge as ‘cowardly and extremely violent’. Not because you’re likely to have forgotten, but because it’s just great fun to type out.

Still on the subject of Bradford Park Avenue, Bob ‘The General’ Blackburn has revealed how he turned down the chance to sign FC United new boy Carlos Roca. According to Blackburn, posting on BPA forum ‘Avenue Online’, Roca’s agent had been pestering the club for a month, but the management team had fears concerning Roca’s mental toughness. Blackburn suggested that Roca tended to go missing ‘when the going got tough, or when it rained’. The deafening roar of people coughing “bullshit!” could be heard coming from the direction of Manchester.

Tony Kempster, the only man in the country, and therefore the world, to fully understand the complicated machinations of the non league structure has revealed on his forum that he has been diagnosed with bowel cancer, and a secondary cancer on his liver. He is to undergo treatment shortly. Tony is a bone fide treasure, and I’m sure you’ll all join me in wishing him all the best.

Rory Patterson was interviewed about his recent transfer in the latest Non League Paper. For those interested, it can be read here. Thanks to Wilmslow Red from the forum for the scan and upload