It’ll Be Off

About bloody time an all
January 11, 2011, 3:43 pm
Filed under: Match Report | Tags: , ,

Fucking hell. It was a long time in coming, but we finally beat Bradford Park Avenue. After nine games, three draws, and six terrible, mostly heavy defeats, goals from Carlos Roca and Jerome Wright saw us snatch a 2-0 victory.

Having been informed by text that the FCUM Radio crew were suggesting our goals were against the run of play, I replied indignant that I must be watching a different game. It appears I was. Sam Ashton made a number of excellent saves, BPA had a goal disallowed, and we created nothing until Roca scored with only eight minutes left. I can only assume that my early arrival at CYCM coupled with the brain mashing punk of The Revenge Of The Psychotronic Man  (and as an aside here, I know it’s only January, but I’m tempted to predict I won’t be hearing a sentence as good as “Who wants to hear a song called Felch Death Fuck Storm?” for the rest of the year) temporarily affected my cognitive reasoning and understanding of the game. The alternative is that I was haplessly drunk and know fuck all about football. I’m sticking with the former…

Speaking to a group of Avenue fans in the Swan and Cemetery post-match, we got on to the subject of their fat, idiosyncratic leader, Mr Blackburn. They were less than charmed by his zany ways. In fact they claimed that all the goodwill the club had built up over years had been immediately undone by his clumsy, dunderheaded ways, and that they’d rather be playing at a lower level without him in charge. They also said he was lazy, and did fuck all work, leaving Kev Hainsworth to do all the running around, while he attempted to take any credit. And who am I to argue with such well-informed sources?

It looks like neither ourselves nor BPA will be getting promoted any time soon. And this is good. Despite the arrival on the scene of Halifax, and their odd yet slightly touching obsession with us, BPA remains the most anticipated fixtures of the season. The prospect of another two games against them next year, especially if we continue beating the bastards, is a good one.


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