Filed under: News, Opinion | Tags: Andy Carroll, Fernando Torres, replica shirt burning idiots, Transfer deadline
So sickened was I by the lack of transfer activity yesterday, I went down to Hope Mills and burned an un-numbered replica shirt in disgust. With Liverpool spending seven Ten Acres Lanes on woman-beating crock Andy Carroll, and Chelsea throwing fourteen Ten Acres Lanes at Fernando Torres and David Luiz, was it too much to expect Margy to join in the fiscal jamboree by signing someone unnecessary at an over the odds price? Why should Premier League fans have all the fun, groaning in disbelief as they splash money about like wine at a Roman orgy? Over £225million was spent by Premier League teams this January. £225 million! And this with virtually every single Premier League team in debt. The media tried to portray yesterday as the day football finally went mad. Bollocks to that. Football went mad years ago, yesterday was just a sick-burp as those at the top table continued to gorge despite filling up long ago.
Special praise for those fans who braved the elements to burn their replica shirts in front of a Sky TV camera outside stadiums across the country. How these precious darlings cope with everyday life when they display such alarming sensitivity is yet to be explained, but I’m sure as soon as they come out of their betrayal induced traumatic coma they’ll spill their guts to us. I mean, fucking really, people? Is this what it has come to? Hanging around outside a stadium on transfer deadline day is remarkably dumb enough, but then being part of a baying mob who set fire to a garish piece of fifty quid polyester? Oh, the shame you have brought on the human race! It’s one step above being part of a Big Brother eviction crowd.
Football has lost all sense of perspective, both in terms of those running the game, and those who ‘support’ it. And with no sign of this total and absolute mentalness abating, the answer to the question that people fire at me all the time about what I’ll do if the Glazers do sell up and leave Manchester United shall remain the same: Fuck all.
Thank heavens for FC United, a tiny yet important example of sanity, in an increasingly crazy world.
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