It’ll Be Off

More on Rooney
April 4, 2011, 6:34 pm
Filed under: News | Tags: , ,

It soon became clear after whatfuckingwhat-gate that the nation was clearly divided in to two camps. Those who thought that Rooney’s actions were an unacceptable and a disgrace, and those of us who don’t wet the bed.

Leading the tub-thumping for the easily offended was, and this’ll come as no surprise to anyone, the Daily Mail. With a column that reached Brass Eye levels of satire, Patrick Collins opined that “if Rooney is allowed to bellow the sexual oath at a live microphone without repercussion, then nobody in authority will ever be taken seriously again.” Elsewhere, Lord Pendry said that “Players should be banned and maybe in time, that will make them accept their responsibility to the young people who look up to them, clearly forgetting that the job of a footballer is primarily to play football, and the job of a parent is to ensure kids don’t yell WHAT FUCKING WHAT just because they saw Wayne Rooney do it on the telly. And funniest of all was Graham Poll, who suggested Wayne Rooney had ruined Mother’s Day, in an echo of the post I made yesterday, finally tipping this whole absurd affair in to the realms of beyond-parody.

Except the FA then slapped a two match ban on Rooney, a charge so ludicrous as to lead me to believe the Fergusonian whispers of anti-United bias and agendas. The alternative is to believe that football is not only irredeemably fucked, but governed by a bunch of precious old fogeys, too busy making jam sponges in the church hall to run OUR game properly, and only get involved when someone dares utter profanity or blasphemy.

Because right now the message the FA is putting out is that it’s OK to asset strip a football club, to move it to the other end of the country, to kick it out of their home and change the locks, to shoot an intern with an air rifle, to rape, drink, take drugs, and steal, to refer to a fellow player as a ‘fucking poof’, to shout racist abuse, to do all this and worse beside, but it’s not OK to swear. As someone tweeted but minutes ago: “The FA’s knack for vigorously+mercilessly prosecuting the wrong issues is uncanny. Traffic wardens when you need Police.” Nail on the head.

If I were Wayne Rooney, I’d take the two match ban without appeal, then never, ever pull on the shirt of England again. He’s been carved up not only by the media, but by the Football Association who’ll be begging him to play for them in the next few months. Fuck them.


6 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Rooney is an idiot.

Are you telling me the FA have not been lenient with the little bugger, recently? Not even 4 weeks ago did he elbow McCarthey in the face and get nothing. “But there is a rule that states when a ref deals with in game incidences the FA cannot act further on the matter” Fair enough. Fucked up, non-sensical rule but a rule nontheless.

Now, Rooney swears intentionally directly down the camera-mans throat. There’s a rule against that too, something about not INTENTIONALLY using abusive language or actions. Bollocks rule I hear you cry. Ah yes but a rule nontheless. Therefore he is punished.

I agree with you on the subject of not playing for England again. I would love to see the back of the miserable ignorant little cock. Earns shit loads a week, face like a slapped arse.

Comment by Getoverit

Won’t somebody please think of the children?

Comment by J. Walter Weatherman

Methinks ‘getoverit’ may well have wet the bed last night.

Comment by Wayne

Your attempt of aserbic wit defies even you wayne. Also your lazy attempt of a quip only heightens your inabilty to Create a decent argument.

Think you need a college education before you start debating little man.

Comment by Gotoverit

Critical analysis – aserbic should be acerbic. I’m going to let the missing capital initial letter on the proper noun go – because I’m a benevolent soul. Incorrect usage of capitalisation in the middle of the second sentence.

All in all a poor effort unless you’re only educated to kindgergarten level in which case I’d say ‘decent effort’.

Comment by Wayne

getoverit, jesus christ, you wet the bed son? bet you’re scouse or a bitter, fact of the matter is rooney should not have been punished for two games just for merely swearing, I hear worse than that in a kick about between, and wait for this one cos it will blow your mind, a bunch of fucking school kids, get a brew, get a nice copy of the daily mail and grumble about something fucking worthwhile like fecking libya or japan, not about a footballer getting some anger out by uttering a swearword

Comment by spuddy998

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